The Art of Friendship

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We spend our days thanking the shopkeepers for packing our bags, thanking the guy who holds the door open for us when our hands are full of shopping bags, thanking our customers who leave our stores and thanking the bank for being able to have an overdraft so that we can naughtily buy those shoes that we wanted before payday, but are we really thankful for those things? Sure, we are appreciative, without a doubt, but can we really say that these things give us a genuine, beaming smile to be thankful for? Which then leads us to the thought process of “What am I actually thankful for?”

One of the things that I am the most thankful for in my whole life is my network of friends. Over the years, the size of my friendship group has fluctuated, leaving me one day with 20 friends and the next day with only 2 friends. It happens. It is of my opinion that we only find our true friends as we get older. Sure, I still have childhood friends who I love just like they were my own blood, but when we go to school, we rarely keep in-touch with all of our friends.

In my most recent years, I have learnt a lot of lessons from my friends. Lord knows, without them, there is no way that I could have walked away from ‘that’ relationship and still keep my sanity (and patience) without them by my side, encouraging me to keep on going.

That’s the great thing about having great friends; you can tell them anything and present them with any problem and they will always support you, whoever you are or whatever you have done. I am lucky enough to have a very good, close-knit friendship group who are fiercely loyal to one and another.

It hasn’t always been this easy, as there are tests to every friendship. There are a lot of jealous people in the world who don’t have many friends, partly because they are jealous people who look for any avenue to talk about you. That, again, is a part of life which we must accept.  When presented with a person like this, keep your cool and do not retaliate. There is nothing worse than a conversation from a good friend asking:

 “Did you say this? Why? Well ……said that………”

 It’s an awful feeling and you know that you f**ed up straight away, leading you wanting to find the person who has been stirring the pot and strangle them with their own Gucci. It’s important not to feed the beast, as tempting as it may be. I have certainly learnt my lesson from that one. Not something I intend on doing again.

I was asked recently to describe a typical friend in my honest opinion. It’s not a difficult thing for me to do: Be honest, say what you mean, be there for me as I will be for you and be happy. That’s what I look for. The amount of times that you see each other in the week isn’t important. Real friends can share the odd text message here and there and go months without seeing each other. When you eventually do meet up with them, it should be like you only saw them yesterday. That’s what my friends are like. They do not stop talking to you because you haven’t seen them in a few months.

It’s always nice to thank someone for something, so today I want to thank each and every single one of my friends who have been there for me and supported me through thick and thin. Some of you are thousands of miles away and I really, really miss you, some of you are around the corner and some of you, well, I don’t know where you are because you move around so quickly! Without the teary phone calls to you at 3am, the trips to Brighton, the spontaneous ‘wine ‘nights’, coffee dates, dart-board of my ex-boyfriend (I’m joking…..maybe) and continuous love and support from you, I would have gone crazy a long time ago. You all mean the world to me in your own special way.

Thank you and I love you

Click here for the next instalment.

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